All Teddi Bayer wants for Chanukah is for her family to pretend they’re normal. You know, loving grandparents, kids that kiss up for good gifts. . .the kind of holiday other people have. Short of that, Grandma getting run over by a reindeer doesn’t sound too bad. . .until, of course, Grandma June goes missing in "Who Needs June in December, Anyway?"
Add in Kate Austin's wonderful story, "If I Make It Through December" and Mary Schramski's heartwarming "The Perfect Christmas" and you've got the Holiday Spirit gift-wrapped for the season!
Talk about a recipe for disaster!
Take one Long Island housewife, add three kids, an ex-husband from hell,and a botoxed mother who can still wound at thirty feet with just a look.
Stirring constantly, thrust a fledgling business into the mix. Add one murder, a couple of suspects, a lot of food and one dreamy detective. Bring to a slow simmer over low heat and then gently fold in one disastrous bat mitzvah. Turn up the flame slightly and add in a mafia don who is a little too interested in our crazed housewife. Sprinkle generously with secret ingredients.
Throw in a touch of danger and cook to perfection. Serve to anyone needing a good laugh.
A Complete List of Novels Available byStephanie Mittman
Bridge to Yesterday
Harper Monogram 6/95
A Taste of Honey
Harper Monogram 11/95
The Marriage Bed
A Christmas Miracle
Sweeter Than Wine
A Kiss To Dream On
Head Over Heels
Last year I, Teddi Bayer Gallo, nearly killed my husband. This year he's nearly my ex. Last year money grew on trees. This year if my three delicious children and I don't eat, my new interior decorating business might survive. Last year I'd never seen a dead person up close. But this year I've just discovered one. And it's my first paying client….
Can things get worse? Well, the police could suspect my partner, Bobbie, and me of doing the woman in. Then there's my mother, June, who even through all her newly acquired plastic surgery can still give me "the look." And I could fall for sexy detective Drew Scoones, who has fingered Bobbie as his prime suspect.
I mean, really, can you say no to the police?
Let me tell you a story, about a girl on Long Island, who always tried to play life by “the rules”—as outlined in the Secret Handbook of Long Island Rules...
That girl, uh, woman, is me, Teddi Gallo. I’m the mother of three kids under the age of eleven, best friend to Bobbie (who denies there’s any such thing as a secret handbook, but who knows all the moves by heart), and the daughter of June (who has inside info on the rules, but also has a reserved room at South Winds Psychiatric Hospital, as well).
And if I don’t have enough to send me over the edge, my too-handsome-for- his-own- good husband seems determined to drive me crazy. But why?
This is the tale of how I had to re-write that old, dusty handbook—and while doing so, I suddenly discovered the secret to happiness was living by your own rules. And that has made everything different.
4 1/2 stars TOP PICK!
"As always, Mittman has a wonderful book with great humor and heart that can't be put down . "
~ Romantic Times Magazine